RELATING

Relationship really is about relating.
And the best relationships occur when the people involved have some relationship of goodness within themselves. The world game has been "this person standing in front of I is supposed to give me something, make me happy, do something for me, or I'm supposed to do something for them" and that creates all manner of complications simply because another teaching of the world is rather than saying to the other person what can I offer you, there is the assumption that I know what you require and let me give it to you. And then a lot of times hurt feelings emerge because I did so much for you and you didn't appreciate it.
 So, relationship, are you willing to love yourself?
Because getting something from someone else outside of love is really becoming less and less viable. So what does love have to do with it? A lot, really. It is to have a business relationship is not as intimate as having a personal relationship but it still requires respect, first of self and then of the other, it requires listening to what they are saying, really paying attention rather than hearing the words and then going on with your own assumptions about what should outta gotta musta happen. So having a relationship requires involvement, it's not some abstract . And relationship that is going to have any fulfillment in it is not purely a sexual venture. If you really desire to have a relationship then who are you bringing to that relationship?
 Know thyself!
Because if you don't know who you're bringing to the relationship then you're going to go into it from your head rather then from your heart. And a good relationship, even if it's not intimate functions much better when it is a heart full relationship, when there is caring and consideration, when there is compassion involved. So wanting to have a relationship with someone, and yet not really considering their desires, who they are, who you are, but just having an idea how the thing should work and then trying to make it happen is presenting a great deal of frustration for everyone on the planet, because deciding how to make things work in a relationship which is two people is really not viable. And so to understand that a relationship really is about two people coming together. What has happened in the world game is that two people come together and perhaps if it is a potential love relationship in the beginning each one is showing their best, but as the two come together the control games that they have practiced all of their life, starting from when you are children those control games can come into play and soon the relationship that is one relationship is in a battle zone of two people trying to control the same relationship, and one wants to be the dominant force, and that does not make a loving relationship, especially as people are spiritually getting stronger within themselves to have relationships when one person dominates and the other is a follower doesn't feel good. So if you desire to have a relationship it is to find out what your control games are, to recognize what their control games are, not for you to stop them, but as you understand how the control games function, when you don't play into their control games, when you understand what your control games are so that you aren't acting from that place, the whole situation begins to change, it begins to clarify. And when the control games are set aside then there is a much more win win situation rather than one is the winner and one is the loser. And it may be a constant battle to regain a position of power, so really consider that as you desire to have a relationship to understand how to relate rather then trying to make things happen, rather than having an idea of what you want and then setting out to get it , that's great if it allows compassionate consideration for everyone involved but if it is simply attempting to get what you want and not quite considering what's going on all the way around, it can create a battle zone because if it feels if you're trying to take over the situation other people may step back, may stay away, they may not even consciously realize why , except that it feels as though you're trying to take their power or vice versa.